CoStructure

I really didn't want to get out of bed this morning.

Sure, there are the predictable reasons-- it's Monday; I'm getting up earlier than usual; I have to travel from Philly to NYC to start my week; I just had a great weekend. But I also knew that getting out of bed meant having to face all of the responsibilities of my "real" life, and I would much rather put them off for the length of just one more snooze button.

But if I'm to have a properly balanced life, I have to find a way to be happy not despite the work I do, but because of it. Ideally, I should wake up on a Monday morning excited for the opportunities in front of me. 

So what's got me stressed? 

I have a huge to-do list.
This is true. I have a ton of things to do, Things I've been putting off, things that will be difficult, things that will be risky, things that will be time consuming. 

But my to-do list will always be long. I wanted it that way. When I had few things on my list a few years back, I got really antsy until I could find things to put on the list to keep me busy. I like being busy.

So let's take another look. There are a lot of things I want to do, a subset of things I have to do, and a smaller subset of things I really ought to do as soon as possible.

Then there's the set of things I can get done today. While several portions of my day have already been allocated, it's only 9am and I don't expect to go to bed until about 1am. That's 16 hours of time, which even after subtracting obligations should be an ample amount of time to have a perfectly satisfying day of crossing off to-do list items.

Which is why, when I get to NWC today, the first thing I'll do is make a list of the things I want to accomplish today, and limit the list to the tasks I think I can complete within the time I have available to me.

So I've got that covered. Why else don't I want to get out of bed?

I'm going through a life transition.
A lot of changes are coming, in various aspects of my life. There's a lot of uncertainty and there are some big decisions to be made, and I don't feel prepared to address them.

All the uncertainty is stressing me out, so let's address it. I'll dedicate more time to thinking through the questions I don't have the answers to yet, even if just to get a better understanding of them.

In New York, there is a tremendous and constant pressure to achieve. To win. To succeed. To make money. At least, that's my perception.

The reality, though, is that everyone just wants to be happy, and I'm getting better and better at understanding what makes me happy. 

Happniess is in constant transition.

The to-do list will always be long.

There will always be uncertainty and big changes looming.

Mahna, mahna. 

It's time to stop hitting the snooze button.

Let's do this.

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